


This is something of a cronkri AU

by jaler_heichou



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Fluff, Humanstuck, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-06
Updated: 2015-03-11
Packaged: 2018-02-24 07:43:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2573711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaler_heichou/pseuds/jaler_heichou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>so yeah Kankri is a librarian and Cronus is the owner of a guitar shop. what else do you expect</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> so this is from kankri's pov. and yeahh starting off with a short chapter but it'll get better maybe i hope. but yeah warnings for extreme fluff

It has never occurred to you that you would be famous. An actor, an opera singer, a real estate agent even. But you never thought you'd end up as a librarian. Not the best profession, you are aware, but it was something that gave you pleasure, and that was enough. Memories of your days spent alone in the local library, your nose constantly buried in a book. You were always alone, but never lonely. Those were two completely different things. 

But at the moment, you are both alone _and _lonely, yet your nose is still buried on a book. You picked it up from your personal collection at home blindly, and you have no idea what the title even is. Eyes skimming the pages, they never really grasp any of the words. You occasionally peek out the window, which is directly in front of you, all the way across the room. Through the glass you see a man, probably in his early twenties. He has long, greasy black hair that he slicks back. Probably thinking that he looks exquisite. His eyes are dark, and you know this because you've come face-to-face with him once, not because you have incredibly well vision and can see them from where you are now. That would be _ridiculous.___

 _ _ _ _____But there was something about him. He was a naturally loud person. His smile was loud, which was wide and shark-like. His black eyes were loud, and he thought loud. Either that or he was easy to read. The man was not a complicated person. But you don't like to judge, so you have given him the benefit of the doubt. But probably the most compelling thing about him was his scar, etched deep and memorable on the right side of his forehead. You liked scars, and that wasn't to say that you enjoyed the destruction of your body, or anyone's body, because that would be _extremely _triggering. Perhaps you had such an attraction to scars because they held stories. Memories were stored in scars, and were important to one's character. And if character isn't important then you don't know what the fuck is.___ _ _ _ ____


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ehh more short chapters sorry guys but hopefully i can get to the more juicy stuff soon

You sigh. To be quite honest with yourself, you don't mind this, being a librarian and all. Its comfy and peaceful. You go back to your book to avoid being caught staring at the shop next door, although you have no reason to anymore. He’s disappeared and it shouldn’t disappoint you as much as it really did. Spying at your neighbor, you think. Its unseemly.

You sigh again. You've been sighing a lot lately. Maybe you need some adventure. But you're not sure if you're ready to leave your little boat of serenity and protection. You just aren't that kind of person.   


You hear the door open. Well, you don't really hear it, more like feel the breeze that accompanies a new student procrastinating on projects or delicate old women who got tired of petting cats and decided to discover what kids these days are reading. The cold lingers, and you pull your candy red sweater over your mouth and chin to avoid breathing in the cold. You're careful to not get sick. You are, after all, a very careful person.

There’s a jingle from the bell hanging over the door, a jingle you’ve become so familiar to that you barely look up when you hear it. So of course you keep “reading” when a surprisingly large pair of hands yanks the book out of your own. You remember once when you compared his hands to yours. They were almost twice the size, you predict. Of course you haven’t actually tested your prediction, but you’ve seen him play his numerous guitars and his hands couldn’t go unnoticed.

“How’s my favorite camper doin’ today?” The hum of his low voice soothes you, although you always thought he was too loud.

“Would you please keep it down, this is a library and you are disturbing the atmosphere,” you say curtly, whispering of course. You don’t know why you like to delude yourself into thinking that you’ve never met him before, oh he’s so mysterious, you hope to meet him one day, but that will never happen because you wish you could live in a fairytale sometimes. But that would be unrealistic and to put it simply, childish. Maybe you’re just that thirsty for something to happen.

The truth is, you’ve known this man for years. He’s the closest to a friend you have, besides Porrim, who is more of a mother figure to you, even if she is just a few years older than you. No more than four, you were almost certain. And he wasn’t even a “friend”, more like the only other person who could stand you and your daily rants. The whole not-having-many-friends didn’t bother you as much as it should, but you’re still a little disappointed that _this_ guy is the one that had to be your friend. But when he’s all you got, its not really polite to reject it.

“Aw, come on buddy, don’t be like that,” he says, half apologizing. “I was thinking about inviting you for lunch.” The man, Cronus Ampora, smiles wide, as if he believes that something like that could win you over. You’re sorry to say that it works momentarily, but you’re good at lying. It’s a skill you never thought you’d have to master.

“Mr. Ampora,” you say harshly, “I am _working._ If you don’t have the decency to see that, then I have to ask you to leave right now.”

“Chief come on! There’s no one here.” That stings for a reason you can’t explain.

“Kankri.”

Cronus sighs, a long and tired sigh. Also another skill you’ve learned to master. You are a tremendously great sigher, if you do say so yourself.

“Alright. _Kankri Vantas_ , will you pleeeasee go out with me? For lunch of course,” he adds quickly. He knows about your whole celibacy lifestyle, and you appreciate his effort in choosing his words and actions carefully. You admit that must be tedious and a bit bothersome though.

You shrug at his question, putting your hand out instead. Cronus’s gaze goes from your hand to your face. His eyes squint the way they usually do when he’s confused.

“Please return my book to me.”

“Um, sure thing chief. I mean, Kankri. Does this mean you’ll go with me?” His eyes turned eager, then he looked quickly to his watch. “Cause if you’re gonna go, then you better make it snappy. Time is tickin’ here kid.”

You twitch as he continues to _not_ call you by your name. Names were just as important as scars. They held value, made something more important. Why would something have a name if it wasn’t important? Constantly reminding Cronus about this was going to drive you crazy, but at this point you almost thought about giving up. But being the annoying little shit you admit to yourself to be, you continue to pester him about it. You seriously don’t know why he hasn’t abandoned you yet.

“Alright, let us make a little bargain here, shall we? You don’t come here in my library during my work hours, not including my lunch time, and I’ll go to lunch with you _just this once._ ” You speak clearly and slowly, so to give him time to absorb every little detail. You add that lunch part because if he didn’t come over to bug you at least once a day, you don’t think you’d be able to stand that. He was your distraction, even as loud and obnoxious as he was.

“Yes!!! That’s what I’m talking about chief! Let’s go right now, come on! Don’t forget your jacket, its kinda chilly outside. Oh boy I’m so excited this is the first time you’ve ever said yes to me.” Cronus continues to babble while you go to retrieve your coat and scarf. The coat might’ve been too much, but you wouldn’t want to catch some horrid disease. You look over at Cronus while you lock up and flip the sign that read _Out for lunch_. He only had his leather jacket. You could see your breath in the cold. You wonder what it would be like if Cronus ever got sick. Really sick, bedridden sick. So ill that he would never recuperate. Your distraction would be gone, and life would go back to normal, more dreary than it already was. You hated to admit it, but he was the equivalent to your sunshine, perhaps a smidge too bright, but still. You were too dependent on him, and that frightened you.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for lack of updating and this is really dumb but i plan to get better stuff in here

You know you agreed to go out to lunch with him, but you're pretty sure you never agreed to die alongside the boy. You can't say you're completely sure because your heart starts beating uncontrollably and your feet prickle. The fear is making you dizzy.

"What'cha waitin' for, chief?" Cronus looks over to you, waiting for you to follow him. He swings his leg over and holds on to the bars of his motorcycle.

When he starts the motor, your heart flutters and matches the pace of the revving. But you refuse to appear afraid, especially in front of this guy.

"I'm not sure if this method of transportation is the safest. Perhaps the bus instead? Or my car, even?"

Cronus lets out a booming laugh, which startles you. It makes you flustered, then angry. You can feel yourself turn pink.

"Babe, if I'm taking you out to lunch, we're going by my rules. Get on, come on. Don't make me drag you over here." Cronus gives you a sideways glance, and you know-- you _know_ \-- that he means what he says. You glare at him, then walk over to him in a confident manner.

"Alright, let us go then." You adjust your pants, then slide your leg over, behind Cronus. Just as you put on the helmet that Cronus hands you, he revs again and all of a sudden, the bike starts moving. The wind slaps your face immediately, and you furiously wrap your arms around Cronus's midsection. You feel a string of profanities leave your lips before you can stop them, and yes, you are aware that swearing isn't necessarily a nice thing to do, but you're too fucking freaked out to give two shits.

You shut your eyes, muttering, "Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck stop oh my god stop this shitty bike _oh my fucking god stop the bike."_

Your curses are just loud enough for Cronus to hear and you can feel him rumble underneath your arms. Your heart is in your throat and you _can't breathe_.

You creep your hands up his chest, and pull him back, managing to pull yourself up to his ear. You hiss in his ear, "Stop this fucking bike right now Cronus Ampora or I swear I'm going to--"

You gasp suddenly and crash into Cronus's broad back. The wind ceases and your face is numb. You can't feel your lips. The block in your chest vanishes, and you go limp, resting on Cronus's body and panting. Fear is replaced with anxiety, and  just plain out exhaustion. Through the ring in your ears, you can hear laughter. Maybe its your own? But no, you can still feel the rumbling under you, and its numbing your arms. Your hearing clear and yes, Cronus _is_ laughing at you. That fucking kid.

"Cronus... Ampora... its... very rude to laugh... at other people," you pant, too much excitement and shock in your veins. But you're just really tired. You look around you, trying to take in your surroundings. Oh. You're at a traffic light. There are other cars around the pair of you.

Parents in minivans, their bodies turned to chastise children. Kids that couldn't possibly be any older than 20 slamming their foreheads on the wheel, listening to whatever god forsaken music they allow on the radio these days. You almost expect the kid to knock himself out from how hard he shakes his head.

Your breathing slows gradually, and you take on big sigh. You still hear Cronus's laughter.

"Cronus, rude."

His laughter stops abruptly, like he made a mistake. You feel the muscles in his back tense up against your chest. Its a strange feeling to be honest.

"Sorry babe. Its just..." Cronus sighs. You can ~~almost~~ definitely hear the smile on his face. Your blood boils. 

"Just what Cronus? And gentle reminder, my name is Kankri. I never want to hear you call me that treacherous nickname again. Is that understood?"

"You're a big tickle sometimes Kankri," Cronus answers in a tired tone, like he was tired of all your picky bullshit. But maybe you're just as tired with his careless bullshit and shitty attitude.

"You never answered the first question."

"Nevermind."

"Wha--" you start to say something but all of a sudden you start to move again. This time it's more gradual, and the shock isn't as vast. You hold on to Cronus tighter, but you feel a lot calmer than at first. At least, about the bike. Your worries grow over what Cronus was thinking. He's not one to hold back on a conversation, so his hesitation on telling you what he was thinking makes you nervous. You have to save this, because goddamn, you hate the feeling of insecurity.

"Cronus!" You shout over the wind and lean a bit.

"Yeah?"

"What does 'a big tickle' mean?"

Cronus laughs again, and that's all you need.  


	4. Chapter 4

When you wake up, there are only two things on your mind: the "date" and the sudden need of a hot shower.

The "lunch date" could've gone much better, if you were being completely honest with yourself.

For starters, there was the location. You had carelessly assumed that you were going to a buffet, a Subway would've been nice even. But a taco stand in the middle of the park? Nonetheless, the kick of disappointment you felt was overwhelming. Horribly overwhelming. But you don't know what to expect from a boy like Cronus. The kid's father is probably rich enough to buy your family of three, your apartment building, and maybe the rest of the state. Throw in a plethora of islands and it'd barely make a dent in his wallet. Point is, the little bastard has money.

Whereas you're perfectly content with the devastatingly small earnings your father made, at least compared to the Ampora's. But you aren't the type to compare yourself to others, especially if don't want to feel the heavy burden of disappointment again.

However, if anything, the "lunch date" was certainly relaxing, scratching out the bike portion. You almost wouldn't mind him inviting you again, but you'd have to resist. He'd probably think of you as being too easy, and you've heard too many cases of being too nice. That's a tragedy that you'd like to avoid at any costs.

You shudder. You yawn, long and delicious, and get up from your bed, walking into your closet to grab some clothes, then head for the bathroom. You're about to step in the shower, the heat fogging up the mirror already, when you hear a ferocious knock on the door. You can guess who it is.

"DUDE KANKRI I GOTTA USE THE BATHROOM!" The voice of your younger brother screeches through the door. Such an impatient boy.

"You needn't yell Karkat!"

"Whatever. Get out, I need to use the toilet I said."

"You will have to be patient. I've just started my morning ablutions."

There's a pause, then more banging.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT EVEN SUPPOSED TO MEAN? KANKRI GET OUT GOD DAMMIT I'M GOING TO PISS MY PANTS."

"Forgive me, sport," you say, then feel a sick feeling overcome you. You've never said a sentence so uncomfortably before in your _life_.

There's another pause, but its different this time. Its a horrified silence. Then the screaming happens. 

"KANKRI WHAT THE FUCK WHY DID YOU SAY THAT YOU NEVER SAY SHITTY NICKNAMES LIKE THAT WHAT THE HOLY FUCK GOD OH MY GOD I NEED TO GET DAD OH GOD ITS OKAY KANKRI I'M GOING TO SORT THIS OUT JUST PLEASE DEEP BREATHS PLEASE DO YOU WANT ME TO GET YOUR DICTIONARY FOR YOU DON'T WORRY I'LL BE RIGHT BACK ." And so on.

You quickly wrap your towel around your hips, only because if you wrapped it around your shoulders the towel would dangle ungracefully at your thighs.

You love Karkat, but you love your dictionary too, and you can't afford to let Karkat's intensity get anywhere near your precious dictionary. Not in your house.

"Hold that thought Karkat!"

The thumping of footsteps stop, and you swing the door open abruptly. Karkat, in his highly exposing boxer shorts (did the boy have no shame?) and gray t-shirt, turns around to look at you. His hair is a disheveled mess, and it takes most of your willpower to hold back some helpful advice.

"First off, please don't touch my book. Secondly, please forgive me about what I just said. It wasn't like me I know."

"Okay, well, don't do it again. Gave me a heart attack, jesus."

"Yes. Lastly, I'll only be a minute."

"Like hell you are. You take forever in the bathroom." Karkat rubs his eyes with his thumb, index and middle finger. "And please don't make me go over next door again. It's fucking embarrassing."

"Oh come now, the Nitram's aren't that bad."

"Oh haha, I'm laughing my fucking ass off." Karkat gives you a look, and you're already regretting this conversation. If there's anything Karkat is good at, its gossiping. But you suppose that's a family trait. "You're not the one that had to go over there. The one that has to deal with a stuttering cripple and a 25-year-old geezer hitting on you all the time. It's fucking disgusting."

"There's not need to talk like that about such nice people." You take a breath."And Karkat, _I'm_ 25\. That's hardly old at all."

"Well through a 17- year-old's eyes its pretty fucking old."

You roll your eyes, an action you're pretty used to performing around this kid. Perhaps its time to cut this conversation loose.

"Alright, Karkat, say what you please. Let me go take a shower quickly so you can use the bathroom."

"UGH. Forget it. Looks like I'm going next door." Karkat marches off into his room, then heads for the front door. Only then do you notice something being dragged in his hand. It glints in the sunlight, like metal.

"Wait a moment Karkat. What is that in your left hand?"

He looks down to his left hand, then hauls it over his shoulder. "It's a baseball bat, what does it look like?"

"Karkat Vantas, return that to its proper place right now!" The nerve this boy had sometimes!

Karkat swivels around and stares you straight in the eyes, daring you to say anything. "LOOK. If that dickwad tries to touch me again I'm going to shove this baseball bat up his asshole. See if he likes that, which he probably will, the sick bastard."

You're speechless by the grotesque and quite unexpected turn on the conversation. You debate how to answer him, but surely Karkat's protection is most imperative. So you blurt out an "okay" and Karkat gives you a hard nod before stomping out of the door.

You think you handled that pretty well. Now for your shower, which will be cold now. You wasted all that hot water. Such a shame. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ayyy sorry it took so long to update this time, I didnt work on it at all over thanksgiving break cuz tbh i kinda forgot? and getting inspiration to continue this is getting a little scarce, but i'm going to try to update every wednesday, starting next week. and yahh we might get into some fluff later :3c

After saying a quick goodbye to Karkat, you leave the house and lock the door. Its a Saturday. Karkat doesn't have school, and Dad wasn't home either, so you check twice to see if the door was properly secure. You wiggle the door another time, and you see something peek out of the window. Karkat glares at you, yelling something that you can't comprehend. You wave.

Walking down the flight of stairs, you walk to your car and get inside. You turn it on and almost drive off when your phone rings. You reach over to your bag and pull it out and oh you should've known. The only person sensible enough to bug you this early in the morning. You can't even believe that he gets _up_ this hour. You take a deep breath through your nose, and exhale slowly through your mouth.

"Hello?" you say into the phone.

"Ayyy chief!" Cronus answer, and you can hear that shark grin. Goddamn, how can a smile be so loud?

"Its Kankri, Cronus. How many times will I have to repeat myself to you?"

"I dunno. Anyway! How 'bout you come over to my house tonight? Just to shake things up a little?"

What?

"What the hell Cronus. I can't believe you had the nerve to ask such a--"

"NO no hear me out!" He stops talking, like he was preparing himself for something. Your heart races immediately.

"I'm waiting Cronus."

"Heh, well, its kinda embarrassing to say this out loud."

Your hands are clammy now. Please don't let it be what you think it is.

"Well the thing is, my dad is kinda going away for some business shit, and Eridan is going to one of his buddy's place, and the house is gonna be real lonely and you know how big the house is so I thought maybe you could keep me company? Not like a date or anythin' like that but yeah. So can you?"

Well shit. You feel a wave of stupidity wash over you. Why did you think he could _possibly_ have feelings for you. You want to slap yourself for believing that for even a second.  
Then you think of the predicament at hand. If you go, you can't say that nothing will happen, because this is Cronus, and if you're with Cronus, things just happen sometimes. And you've been way too close to those "almost" moments. But then again, what kind of companion would you be to the only person who can stand you and your rants if you didn't help him out? However, his fear of being lonely, if this is what it is, surprises you. You'd never imagine Cronus to be that kind of person. He's fearless, bold, careless, reckless, and you admired him. So that settles it.

"Hmm. Alright Cronus. BUT. You have to promise that I will return home the next day perfectly unaffected by our time together."

"Ha, well, I can't say that now can I? How am I supposed to know if this is gonna affect you at all? I've heard I'm a very persuasive guy, Kanny."

Your eye twitches. "And right now you are doing a very good job and convincing me to change my mind."

"Okay okay, sorry. But I mean, really chief? I'm not gonna ravish you or anything, if that's what you're asking."

You want to believe him, but he's thinking _so loud_. You can hear his thoughts, and they're all saying _unless you want me to_ , because you know without a doubt that Cronus would be all for it.

"'Sides, all we're gonna do is watch movies. That cool?"

"Hm. Yes, that seems like a fine arrangement. So, I suppose I'll drive home with you today?"

"Yessir. That's the plan. Oh and I can pick you up right now if you want."

"You can do that? But Cronus, if you come now, I'll be late. I can't afford to be late, today's a weekday, and there are students who depend on me to open those doors on time to finish the homework they couldn't complete the night before. Goddamn kids."

You hear Cronus catch his breath, but you don't really care if he heard that last part. You didn't like kids. End of story.

"Actually, I'm already here. Three spaces to your left."

Stiffly, you set your phone down, taking another deep breath. Then, mechanically, you move your head to your left, and there he is. How you didn't see him, you don't understand. But you don't have time to. You end the call, grab your things, pull the keys out of the ignition, and walk out of the car in a hurry.

You go over to Cronus, nodding a subtle greeting, and sling your bag over your head before getting on the bike behind him. Cronus looks over his shoulder, grins at you, salutes, then passes the helmet to you.

"Alright let's go, babe."

You don't have time to argue with him because you've suddenly become way too busy gripping on to his body for dear life. How very precious this life seems to be.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i actually had this ready since friday but i had no internet but now i do so yeahh idk how im going to continue this

And so continues a normal day at work, with a short lunch break, alone only for a while before Cronus peeks in to say hello. It makes you uncomfortable, but you cherish those three minutes he comes in because even though you chastise him and shoo him away, he’s the distraction of the day. What a wonderful distraction.

You occasionally peek out the window across the room catching glimpses of Cronus conversing with customers about instruments. He smiles easily with each one, as if he’s genuinely happy that someone was curious enough to walk in the store. Maybe he was. Cronus was a simple man, but what he did and didn’t do genuinely was a true mystery. Take, for example, your friendship. In the beginning, you were almost certain that Cronus had always intended of making a fool out of you, instead of actually developing a sturdy relationship. Later, it began to dawn on you that perhaps he might actually _like_ hanging around you, which baffled you beyond anything.

You scan the words on a random page in a new book you picked up, this one not chosen randomly like others. This one was about a group of Japanese children in a dystopian-like setting, similar to _The Hunger Games_ series, which was popular among middleschool and highschool students. The cover, if you were to put it lightly, was a little startling, but you remember once a kid came up to your desk and suggested it to you. Politely, you said you would look into it, but to be honest, you’ve heard of the book before and it wasn’t really your type. Then again, you always wanted to try new genres, so here you are, reading this book that you’re not really reading.

Yawning, you stretch and look outside the window again. But this time, a set of eyes meet yours and hold. Then there’s a hand waving at you, and you duck down quick before you have time to embarrass yourself (you already have though you’re just making this situation worse). You keep your head on your desk to avoid looking at him again. Your cheeks are hot and you want to punch yourself in the face. Why why _why_ did you let him catch you? Now you’ll have to come up with an excuse.

You rummage through ideas when the bell on the door jingles, but of course you don’t notice. You also don’t notice when Cronus stands in front of the desk, because you are still thinking, your head still down and looking in the opposite direction. But you _do_ notice when a finger taps the crown of your head, twice.

“You alright there, Kanny? You look depressed.”

Raising your head, you gasp aloud. You look him straight in the eye.

“How dare you assume such a thing! I am the happiest person in the world, Cronus! Do you think I’m weak enough to be sucked in such a self-centered disease!?”

“Geeez, sorry buddy.”

“You did not answer the question.”

A sigh. “No, you’re not.”

“I’m glad we have that clear now.”

“Yup.”

“Anyway, may I know the reason behind your coming here?”

“Nah. I just wanted to come over for a bit. No one was coming in so I decided to give myself a break.”

“Oh?”

“And also I want to discuss some plans about tonight.” Cronus adds something to that last word, and it makes your toes curl.

“Yes. We were planning to watch movies. I presume you are making dinner?”

“That’s what I wanted to talk about. Dinner plans, what movies we’re gonna watch, the other stuff.”

So you and Cronus spend the next hour arguing over suitable and appropriate movies, whether you were going to eat your kind of meal, or Cronus. You also decided a reasonable bedtime. After all, you both had work in the morning. Cronus argued profusely in this area. Other arrangements were prepared, then you told Cronus to get back to work.

***

After lunch, the day passes by effortlessly. Normally, you would be worrying over the events that would take place tonight, but goodness, you picked a really good book. You make a mental note to express your gratitude to the boy, should your paths cross again. You check books out for a college student, an old couple, and a family of 2 before stretching and preparing your things to leave for the night.

Again, the tinkling from the bell at the door interrupts the steady silence and you hear a deafening voice calling your name.

“Kanny! Come on now, let’s go! Its fuckin’ cold out here!”

 You do a quick lap around the library to check if anyone still hasn’t left yet,  then swiftly grab your bag and coat, walk out of the library and lock up. You double check the door, when you feel  a long arm secure itself on your waist. Your body tenses up, and you reject the gesture immediately, but he’s got an iron grip. You look at Cronus. He doesn’t even seem to notice your tugging away.

“Onward! To casa Ampora! Oh god, I’m so excited chief. We’re gonna watch a whole bunch of cool movies, and cuddle the whole time, and eat a whole lotta popcorn, which I’m pretty sure we have at home, and we’re gonna stay up ‘til three in the morning…” and so continues his babbling. He seems to have forgotten your entire conversation earlier and everything you two discussed. But you’ll let it slide for today. Because your stomach is a swarm of butterflies now, and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t a little excited too. This is probably the first time you’ve spent the night over a friend’s house, voluntarily. You had to stay over a lot of the Maryam’s, but it was always because your dad had something to do at night, and you were too young to stay home at night alone.

“Hey, come on.” Cronus shakes you out of your thoughts, so you ignore the insects invading your stomach and climb on his bike as gracefully as you can. He turns it on and drives to his house.

***

The bike stops, and both you and Cronus get off. You remove the helmet and place it on the handlebars while Cronus goes over to open the door. Its astounding really, how used you’ve gotten to the bike even though you’ve rid it three times. And all of those times were all in one week.

The keys jingle and you hear the door to his house swing open, the light switch flick on, then Cronsu grabs your wrist and pulls you inside the house.

“Cronus! What is the meaning of this?”

“Lighten up chief! No one’s come over in a long time.”

Your heart tells you that he’s probably tricking you, but you don’t have much of a choice when he ignores your complaints. He tugs you and spins your body before throwing you on a couch that you hadn’t realized was even at such a close distance. Cronus makes his way to a stereo located on a wall, right above a fireplace. He flicks it on and gives you a suggestive look, and you feel a tingle in your spine that reaches all the way to your feet.

He notices your squirming and laughs at you, as if you’re the kind of person to be messed with. You glower in his direction. Cronus pushes some buttons and the sound of various clicks fill the room before a tape rewinds and music plays.

Cronus rushes over to you. He stands still, his eyes closed, one hand on his hip, the other raised in the air and his index finger pointing to nothing in particular.

There’s clapping in the beginning, and it confuses you but then it fades away and there’s a guitar. Then a group of men singing in harmony, and you immediately feel the beat. You get the crazy urge to get up and do something with your feet, but you restrain and look at Cronus instead.

His foot taps to the beat, his head nodding, and you can’t help but stifle a chuckle. The music picks up a bit and Cronus goes all out. By the time the chorus starts playing, you are covering your mouth with your sweater and doubling over, your face red and heat pulsing in your head from keeping in the laughter. You’ve never seen a person so animated and lively before. But its dazzling. You feel a buzz in your bones, and you want to swing around the room with this boy. Its takes major effort to not say anything. The feeling of giddiness makes you lightheaded. Cronus looks at you and winks. You let out a short, abrupt laugh, but when he extends his hand to you, you stiffen and sit up straight. You reject him straight up.

“What’s up?”

“Cronus, you of all people should know that I don’t dance.”

“But you said you don’t like assumin’ stuff.”

“Yes, well…”

“Come on chief. One verse.”

“No thank you, I’m completely comfortable right here.”

“Pleaseeee? I haven’t danced with anyone in so long.”

God _dammit_ , you hate when he plays that card. He always pretend to be soooo lonely, and sometimes you forget, but yeah, he must be lonely. Because even though he tries to act all cool and chill and social, he’s probably just as lonely as you because no one can stand his cockiness. You two are so alike it hurts. But the only difference is his desperation for companionship. He’s willing to take any fish in the ocean, be it a whale or jellyfish or a puny goldfish. But of course you were the goldfish to take the bait, and you didn’t even put up a fight when he reeled you in. You completely succumbed to his good looks, his loose personality, his know-it-all attitude. You _hate_ that.

You, you like being alone. As for being lonely, you guess that you couldn’t take that either, which would explain your friendship with Cronus.

But you don’t want Cronus to be alone. So if you were being honest with yourself, fine, okay, you maybe want a friend. A someone, an anyone that you could call yours.

And here was this guy, who was looking at you with arms open and he isn’t safe and should you take the bait this time?

Cronus look at you, and his face is telling you that he want s to dance with you, that he wants you to be comfortable around him, you guys should be good friends, and he probably wants to be more than friends. He wants to be more than friends, and probably wants to be in your pants right now, but also is waiting for your approval to dance. So hell yes you’re taking the bait.

Standing slowly, Cronus notices nothing in your hesitant movements. Before you can say a word, he yanks you up and hugs you tight and quick. Your face is buried in his chest and wow, you’ve never realized how appealing he smells.

“Goodness! Gentle reminder that personal space is appreciated.” Flushing, you get irritated. “Don’t push it.”

Cronus snickers, which makes your hand itch to slap him, but pulls away. He hasn’t let go of your hand.

“My hand.”

Cronus rolls his eyes. You squint at him, then promptly yank your hand back. But then he takes it back. Your blood boils.

“You—“

“Left foot! No that’s not your left chief. Spin!” Cronus shots commands and you forget whatever you were going to say and focus on moving your feet. Cronus pokes and mumbles a few things before he pokes your side once more.

You sigh exasperatedly, and look down at your feet, trying to concentrate. “What _now_? How can I still be doing this wrong?”

“Kan, you gotta _feel_ the beat.”

“It’s not as simple as it seems.”

Cronus grins crookedly at you then grabs your waist.

For the rest of the song you give up and put your feet on Cronus’s, letting him control the dancing. Feeling lightheaded again, you lean slightly on Cronus. You hope he doesn’t mind. He probably doesn’t.

The song ends abruptly and the two of you wait for the next song, hand in hand, face to chest, breathing labored. You can feel the muscles on Cronus’s chest through his shirt on your face, and it’s such a peculiar yet pleasurable feeling.

The next track takes a while to play, but when it does, the soft strumming of a guitar soothes you instantly. A deep, sleepy voice starts singing, making you feel like you’re floating.

“’ _Love me tender, love me sweet. Never let me go.’”_

You stiffen at the lyrics, and you suddenly become aware of how close you are to Cronus. _Remember your vows, remember your vows Kankri._ You don’t want to hurt your feelings, so you push him away gently, but Cronus won’t let you. You blush furiously. Then Cronus does something you’d never expect. He wraps his arms around your body and places his cheek on the top of your head. Now you’re absolutely stuck.

“Um. Cronus.”

“Yeah.” His voice is as soft as a marshmallow and as quiet as his breathing, and you lose your train of thought. He’s holding you so gently and close that you almost want to cry.

“What song is this?”

“ _Love me tender_ by Elvis Presley,” Cronus replies, his face still on your head.

“Its very beautiful. Very pretty. But if you wouldn’t mind…” you motion to Cronus and try to pull away from his embrace again, but Cronus ignores you. His arms around you tighten.

“Please.”

“Please what? That’s an improper sentence.” You try to break the serious mood with being picky, but it doesn’t work. The only time it doesn’t work.

“Can we stay like this for a while?”

Well shit. You don’t know what to do because you can’t help but focus on the fact that Cronus’s arms envelope your body perfectly. And your heart is beating insanely fast, and the smell of cheap cologne is filling your lungs and maybe you like Cronus a little. You can’t find it in you to separate from him right now, and then he starts singing and oh no please don’t do that because you might cry. You’re such a fucking softie.

So you stay still, unable to image how he’ll react if you leave him and you shouldn’t have come here. You knew something like this would happen, that he would test the lines of friendship.

But maybe you can’t say no to him because you maybe love him a tiny bit. You maybe, probably love this boy a lot. About 67 percent.

Cronus’ singing distracts you from your inner confession, and you sigh softly.

“’ _Love me tender, love me true, all my dreams fulfilled_. _For my darling, I love you. And I always will_.’”


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry about not updating this but I just kinda lost all inspiration to finish this??? Also to specify, whenever I update it'll be on Wednesdays, but that doesn't mean that I'm going to update every Wednesday. Hopefully I can finish up chapter 8 by next week, I've already started it :3. Also since I'm losing motivation, please please PLEASE, if you guys can give me ideas or what you want to happen in the fic. It'll help me tremendously c:

Your feet tingle, your heart pounds rapidly. You be careful to take measured breaths to cool yourself down. Wiping your clammy hands on your pants, you allow one large sigh to escape your lungs. Dancing had tired you out tremendously, especially since it’s the first time you’ve ever preformed the act.

You slump against Cronus’ living room couch, brown and leathery. It’s a pleasant brown, matching the rest of the room. However, it was cold. So damn cold. Shuffling noises come from the kitchen, and you can hear the sink water run.

“Do you need anything chief?” he called.

“No thank you, I’m fine. “

“Are you sure? I can get you some water, if you want.”

You consider your dry throat and exhausted body. “Alright, perhaps I would like a drink.”

“One water, comin’ right up.”

More shuffling noises, then you watch as Cronus walks into the living room with two glasses; one with water, the other filled with a liquid, dark and fizzy. Probably soda. You give Cronus a disapproving look, but he isn’t looking at you. He walks carefully over to the couch and hands you your drink.

“That’s not exactly healthy.” Cronus rolls his eyes, which you mock in response.

“I drink what I want. You don’t see me complaining about your stuff.”

“I suppose not.” You can understand how your naturally picky personality can bug Cronus, but you don’t  really care.   
“Actually chief, can we go upstairs? I have a better TV in my room. Also its pretty hot down here. My room is cooler.”

It is definitely _not_ hot in here, and you’d like to stay downstairs, but you’d rather fall asleep on a teenager’s bed than an old leathery couch. You could hurt your back, after all. So you tell him okay, and you’re both walking up the stairs before you realize you forgot something.

“I’ll catch you in a second, I need to make a phone call.”

“M’kay.” Cronus walks ahead without turning, and you go back down and dial your home number.

“Hello?”

“Karkat?”

“Who else would it be, dumbass?” Okay. “And where the fuck have you been? You left this morning and its almost 11. Do you know how pissed I am?”

You feel guilty all of a sudden, because even though Karkat pretends to hate everyone and everything in the world, and always has to be upset over _something_ , you know that this kid cares and worries more than you ever could. An unhealthy amount, you’ll admit. Its sweet and over exaggerated. But he can’t help it, and you feel that. He’s just an emotional kitten.

“ I’m sorry Karkat. I meant to tell you earlier, but it slipped my mind. I’m staying over with a friend tonight because of… issues.” You’re not sure if you used the correct term.

“What-”

“It’s none of your business. Just make sure to lock the doors and make sure the windows are shut tight. Where’s dad?”

“Probably scampered off with the Leijon tonight. He’s been doing that a lot recently.”

“Ah. Okay, well, I’ll see you tomorrow then. After work of course. And I was wondering… if _maybe_ you want to go to that church meeting tomorrow night with me?”

“No.”

“Please? I need someone to keep me company.” Bullshit. You go alone every week. You know you’re being excessively hopeful too.

“I don’t wanna.” He says it bluntly and shows no reserve for your emotions, but you figured he’d say that. However, you don’t want to force him, because then what kind of Christian would you be? You feel an itch of irritation nonetheless, almost to the point where you want to drag him to church. Maybe it’s more than an itch.

“Okay. Goodnight.”

“Bye.”

You hang up and take a deep breath before going back upstairs. You creep through the hallway, peeking in each room for any sight of Cronus. You should’ve asked him for a map.

A door opening from behind makes you jump. You squint at the light coming from one room, but let out a sigh of relief when you see Cronus’ head.

“In here chief.”

“Sorry,” you mumble, and quickly tiptoe back a couple of steps.

Still squinting, you enter his room. To be quite honest, you don’t know what you were expecting. A messy disorganized room perhaps? Yes, but definitely not this.

His room is appears to be split in half, which is strange. One half is neat and tidy. Reminds you of your room. It has the same feel as the living room; antique but cozy. But so goddamn cold. You stretch your sleeves out and curl your fingers to cover your hands. You tuck them under your chin and sit on the edge of Cronus’ bed. Its nice.

You glance over to the other side of the room. Clothes strewn all over the floor, a case full of motorcycle helmets. You wonder if he bought them for every girl he tried to take home. Lots of girls apparently. Posters tacked on the walls, covering almost every inch. Bits of the wall you can see show you that it used to be an indigo color. In front of the bed is a rather large TV for a single person bedroom. Set aside are video game controllers and games, some not in their case. The wires are all tangled.

“I didn’t know you play video games,” you say, cringing at how it breaks the comfortable silence.

“Not usually, but Mituna came over yesterday. He was gonna come over today but I told him no. Told him he spit on my screen.”

“Oh.” You don’t really know what to say to that. At least he was honest about his friends, although you highly doubt that _that_ was the main reason he wouldn’t let Mituna come over. With a sigh you lay down on his bed, kicking your feet. You hug yourself tighter.

“Is it cold to you?” Cronus asks.

“A little, but I’m fine.”

“I can get another jacket for you if you want.”

Before you can come up with an excuse, he goes over to one of the walls and opens it. Blinking, you sit up and watch him.

Oh. _Ohhhh_ , that’s not a wall. A built in closet, looks like. You hold your breath as he looks through his jungle of clothes. Overwhelming.

You look down and fiddle with your fingers, suddenly very interested in your cuticles. You pick at them absently.

All of a sudden its dark and you freeze. It’s cold and the air around you has gotten colder. You shiver without meaning to, and then--light again.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to throw it on your face. Plus its cold ain’t it? Um, here use this one instead.”

Cronus removes his jacket and leans toward you, throwing the other jacket behind him on the floor and holding out his jacket in front of him.

Spreading it out like he’s going to cover your face again, he wraps it around your shoulders instead. He tucks it around you snuggly and his face is right by your neck and _you can’t fucking breathe._ You try to move air in and out of your lungs as evenly as you can. Its not like this was romantic or anything of the sort. Goodness no. In fact it was the exact _opposite_. He was in your bubble, and if there’s anything you hate more than fake assumptions, it was people getting in your personal space. Even if it was Cronus. _Especially_ if it was Cronus. He’d find some way to sexualize a moment like this. No sir, not today.

You say a silent prayer in your head when he moves away, apparently satisfied with his work. Cronus whistles and your eyebrows tug to the middle.

“Damn chief, you look good in leather.”

You roll your eyes, but he looks away like he’s done nothing wrong. But you don’t say anything because you are very warm now. You can feel his body heat coming off the jacket and its nice. Your eyelids droop but you fight against them. No sleep. Not yet.

                                                                                                                                                                                                        


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ehh this one was kind of short, and idk how to continue it now more than ever. i still don't know if i want to keep this sfw or not.

Two , three, four hours pass by and you’ve seen Finding Nemo and Pulp Fiction, and you’re re-watching Nemo _again_ when you remember that you have work in the morning, but maybe you’ll just call in Aranea or Porrim. Someone who can keep their mouth shut for a while, and at least has a slight appreciation for reading.  You’ll call them an hour before work. That should be enough time. Maybe.

 You’re also too tired to realize that you’ve been cuddling with Cronus ever since he gave you his jacket. You feel like a rag doll, limp and lifeless. Your eyelids have been half closed for the past hour now, but the light from the TV won’t let you shut them all the way. You snuggle deeper into Cronus’ chest, his arm slung around your shoulder and wrapped tight on your waist, supporting you so that you have a better view of the screen.  He smells too much like cologne but you don’t care right now either. You just don’t really give any fucks when you’re tired.

You take a looong, exhausted breath, but you feel like you’ve taken a drag from a cigarette. You thought he quit smoking already. Obviously not. You sputter and cough suddenly, straightening up and pushing Cronus away. You cough in the opposite direction of him, your elbow over your mouth, spraying germs all over his jacket. Cronus pats your back hesitantly, like he’s not sure if you’re ok with this. Hell, you’ve been touching _all night_.

“Doin’ alright, babe?”

You choke one last time before you answer him. “God _dammit_ Cronus, my name is Kankri! Kaaaaaaakriiiii. Got it?”

Cronus just… kind of looks at you, but he chuckles and smiles before giving you a thumbs up.

“You got it Kanny.”

“Auuuugh,” you groan and flop back onto Cronus, landing on his lap instead of on his shoulder. You feel him freeze and shuffle, but you move to where your head is on his legs and curl your own. You continue watching the movie, and you can tell that Cronus was having a hard time resting his hands on anything. There was nowhere to place them comfortably but on your body.

So, to put him at ease, you tell him bluntly, “Touch my hair,” and he immediately does so.

You think back to when you and Karkat stayed over at the Maryams a lot. Whenever you or him couldn’t sleep, Porrim or her mom would make you lay your head on their lap and curl up in a fetal position. Then you’d watch cartoons as one of them stroked your head and played with your hair, and you’d fall asleep blissfully. As you got older and were allowed to stay home, you and Karkat would be in the living room and you’d play with his unruly hair, leaving it soft and silky. He always ruined it by morning. Of course, by the time you were 14, you stopped doing it altogether. Everyone was all grown up. If you can’t go to sleep, tough luck kid.

And you are now 25, and it’s been 11 years since anyone last touched your hair, and sometimes you just want a cute boy’s lap to rest on. Is that too much to ask for?

“Mmm,” you sigh contently, still not able to shut your eyes all the way. Cronus pats your head softly. You feel like a kitten, and its nice.

“So,” Cronus says, probably just to break the silence. The air is strange now, disturbed. “Don’t you hate that?” He whispers it.

“What?” You whisper back, not sure why you didn’t speak louder. Its not like there was anyone in the house that could hear you. Just you two. Cronus and you.

“Uncomfortable silences,” he says with a playful tone in his voice. “Why do we feel its necessary to yak about bullshit in order to be comfortable?” You get it now. He’s quoting from the movie you just watched.

“Cronus,” you grumble, “Its too late to be alluding to bad movies.”

“Bad movies?! Ey, chief, I wouldn’t go so far as to call it bad. Fact, Pulp Fiction is a fuckin’ great movie.”

“It most certainly was not.”

“I dunno, I thought it was pretty amazing.”

“You would.” Knowing you were strong minded, and since Cronus wasn’t letting this go, it would probably be a while for this argument to end.

“Well, I’ll admit it was hard to keep up with. I’ve watched it lotsa times, still can’t put the stories together.”

“Okay,” you mumble, rolling your eyes and turning your body opposite of the TV. That left you staring at Cronus’ stomach, right at his belly button. If Cronus noticed, he kept quiet. He seemed half asleep himself. However, from your position, you didn’t want to wake up the _other_ parts of his body. Trying again, you sit up but now you’re cuddling with Cronus again.

So another half hour passes, and you can’t stop thinking about Nemo’s friends. Children. You haven’t given much thought about it. You’d certainly wouldn’t want a child like Nemo, otherwise you’d turn into a human Marlin. A worrisome, overprotective, clumsy father.

“Cronus?”

“Hm?” Neither of you look at each other, just sort of nudge one another’s shoulder. Your eyes are glued to the screen, but because you quite literally cannot move your eyes. They’re in that tired, frozen state.

“Do you want kids?”

“Sure. Why not? I mean, sure they’re little shits, but they’re kinda cute sometimes. So yeah, maybe like, two. Once I have a family and all.”

“Interesting.”

Cronus scoffs. “And you?”

“My answer is actually very similar to yours, if not exactly alike. Children can be rowdy. And impatient. Also needy. Not to mention  for the first couple of years they require your undivided attention. But yes, that can wait until a family is established. Who knows, I might change my mind later.”

“That’ll be a while won’t it.” There’s silence, and it feels like you are holding your breath. Then you see a flash of red. You barely notice it but its definitely there.

“Excuse me?” This time you feel a spark of irritation, only dull. You try to ignore it, but knowing yourself, its more than a bit difficult.

“Oh come on Kanny, when was the last time you settled down with someone huh?”

“I could ask you the same thing.”

“At least I’ve _had_ a girlfriend.”

You both face each other now, forgetting the movie and that a clownfish and a brainless blue fish were stuck inside of a whale,  the blue one convinced that she knew the whale tongue. Ah, the wonder of animated movies.

“How long did she last?” You don’t really register how rude you’re being, but Cronus just keeps adding to the fire.

“More than she could’ve lasted with you.”

“At least I have morals.”

“Morals or expectations?”

“Cronus!”

“No, you don’t have me yet. Besides, I bet you haven’t even kissed anyone yet.”

“What a ridiculous thing to assume!” When did this turn into a children’s argument on the playground?

“Aww, Kanny, the boy with the purest lips in the world.”

“Cronus, you are acting like a child.” The flames inside you were going wild.

“Little baby Kanny ~,” Cronus sings your name in a cutesy voice, and you’ve never really felt violent before in your life but you imagine the relief you would feel if you punched him in the throat right about now. Goodness, you need sleep .

“I’m getting tired of your bullshit.”

“Little baby Kanny ~” He continues to sing the nickname and pokes your cheek and you don’t know if it’s to  acknowledge that you just swore, but you’ve had enough. You’re too fucking tired for this, and there’s only one way you can think of quick enough to shut him up. So you kiss him.

Because what the fuck are you supposed to do? You grab his face and peck him on the corner of his mouth, quick and harmless, too quick for you to taste him. Just fast enough to feel his cool lips and that’s it. And you’re too pissed to be embarrassed, too exhausted to notice Cronus go red, too fucking sleepy to care if you snuggled up to him right after (arms crossed and brow furrowed, mind you).

You shouldn’t have kissed him.  

 


End file.
